The One-Winged Girl

Three years ago, as part of BEDIS, I wrote an entry about tattoos, a little bit of the history on my interest in them, and a conclusion with the fact that I was still very on the fence about taking the plunge.  I made some good points as to why it might ultimately be a risky decision, but as we all know, I'm statistically full of shit, and for the purpose of dramatic effect, I go back on the things I say, all the time.

What I mean to say is, dear friends, it's happened.  I have gone under the needle, and I will never be the same.

I've been talking about getting a tattoo for a while, but there's a really big leap between talking about and actually doing.  What eventually pushed me into action is a longish story better saved for its own entry, so the short version of it is:  tomorrow is never guaranteed.

This isn't to say that I jumped right in.  Over the course of a few days, I quietly thought about it, bounced it off DG in passing, and then, yes, ultimately, one afternoon, I stared at my reflection in a computer monitor and said, "Ok.  It's time to do this," after which, I spent another 2 weeks searching for designs, artists, and parlors.

I had a pretty good idea of what I wanted on my design - a sumi-e stroke-like wing with the words, "We are each of us angels with only one wing."  (Shocking, I know.)  The problem is, I didn't really know how to translate that to art.

Enter my tattoo artist, Josh Hoffman.

Picture via True Hand Society

My sister got the recommendation for True Hand from a friend who lives locally, and so I figured, why not.  After browsing through their portfolio, I shot them an email with my very incoherent idea, Josh immediately replied, and I nearly had a panic attack.  I won't sugarcoat details - when I saw his picture and his Instagram, I became very intimidated by this burly, tatted, bearded man who might see me as one of those annoying first-timers who asks stupid questions.

And, the exchange was admittedly a little rough at first.  Maybe I had too much in my description, or not enough, but it took at least a full week for us to figure out what exactly I was going for.  And even after that, it wouldn't be a least a month until I could actually schedule my visit to the parlor.  This, though, I took as a good sign.  Hopefully it meant he was super busy with other clientele because he was in high demand.

Feb. 19th.  Day before my appointment arrives.  My stomach is knotting up a tiny bit.  I start searching Google and r/tattoo for tips on how to prep, proper etiquette around your artist, etc.  A few common things I picked up:

• Don't bring a crew (one or two is ok, but a crowd gets to be a pain.)
• Tip well if you like it
• Eat normally 
• Don't get drunk/high beforehand
• Be honest about your pain tolerance
• Listen to everything your artist says about aftercare, or face the consequences

Aside from the "don't get drunk" thing, all of these seemed like common sensical advice.  Still, I wanted to double-check.

Me:  "This is my first tattoo.  Is it cool if I bring my bf for moral support?"
Him:  "Yes, of course."
Me:  "Anything I should bring/do beforehand?"
Him:  "No, you're good.  Just make sure you eat breakfast."

Being the good boyfriend that he is, DG drove with me to Fishtown and held my hand the entire way from the parking lot up to the building.  The tummy-turning had largely subsided as I reached the loft-like studio, though I was still remarkably nervous.  The studio turned out to be a little smaller than I anticipated, though, in a way that made it more comforting - more intimate, as it were.  It definitely had a distinct style

Meeting Josh in person definitely put me at ease, too.  He turned out to be very chill and understanding, and DG kept insisting that he looked like The Dude (jury's still out).  We chatted about the design some more, and after clarifying one or two details, he set about to drawing it for me.

To be honest, it wasn't 100% what I had been thinking of, but I liked it so much that I couldn't think of what to say to really change it.  I nodded and said, "Alright.  Let's do this."

He set it to a transfer and put a temporary version on my shoulder, for placement, and to make sure that I actually liked the way it looked on me:

And, you know what?  I did.  Quite a lot.

Finally, all that was left to do was brand it onto my skin, permanently (she says like it was the easiest, shortest step in the world.)

Spoilers -- it was not.

Starting out

About 1.7 hours in -- almost there!

DG waiting patiently and taking pics.  Thanks, sweetie.

For those of you who are not familiar with what the tattooing process actually entails, I recommend that you watch this clip (relevant portion starts around 3:10 and ends around 4:10):

I think most people are aware of this by now, but the needle does not actually penetrate much farther than the dermis.  So, no, it does not feel like getting a shot at the doctor's office a thousand times.

A lot of people will tell you that everyone has a varying pain tolerance, and that the pain will also be less noticeable depending where you actually place the tattoo.  The general consensus is that the butt is the least painful place, thanks to all the padding, while tattooing right above bony areas tends to be more painful (but there was no scale as to how painful).  Other than that, no one could give a consistent answer, so to all you would-be hopefuls, I can't give you much advice other than breathe.

On average, I consider my pain tolerance to be pretty high, and fortunately, I was not incorrect. When the needle first hit my skin, I was pleasantly surprised to discover that I was not in agonizing pain, nor in any real pain at all.  It's a bit hard to describe the sensation, particularly because it changed depending on which part of the shoulder he was working on.  On the more padded parts, it sort of felt like someone was tapping me with a meat tenderizer - uncomfortable, but not intolerable.  When he was right on top of my scapula?  Ehh... that was a little less nice.  That felt more like someone was dragging a hot rake across my skin in an ineffectual attempt to flay me.  Again - not intolerable, but not something I would get addicted to.

Not that I could complain.  At the same time, someone next to me was getting their whole chest tattooed, and was somehow not screaming his lungs out (though a few manly tears were shed.)

All the while, I was chatting idly with both Josh and DG about work, vacations, family, so on and so forth.  Before I knew it, two hours had passed, and I was done.

Wowza.

Both DG and I were so impressed by the brushstroke-like detail in each feather.  I was so happy with it that I didn't care that it had strayed a little from my original concept (and, of course, even if I did care, it's on me forever).

For real -- if I could reach back in time, I would get a high five from me, ages 13-present.

Aaaaaand, that's it!  Right?  That's the end of this entry?

Nope.

So, what some people will gloss over is all the aftercare required when actually get your awesome-sauce tattoo.  Not complicated, but very important if you don't want a terrible infection or your tattoo to fade in like a week.  Don't wash it too often, or you'll dry out your skin.  You'll want to keep it hydrated with ointment - something like bacitracin first (because, yes, it is in fact an open wound), then normal moisturizing lotion later.  And, thanks to my decision to get it on my shoulder, I became quite talented at reaching around like a circus contortionist.

What the internet also often forgets to mention?  It will itch like a mofo.  For weeks.  And no, you may not scratch it.

The first few days, it actually didn't itch quite so much, likely due in large part to the fact that it was still more sore and tender from the impact of 10 needles being jabbed at my skin at like 100 rpm.  The next two weeks though?  That was far more intolerable than the actual tattooing process itself.  I would catch myself unconsciously rubbing at it through my clothes during the day, and in the mornings, I would wake up with bits of black dirt under my nails.  Most people recommended that, if you really had to do something with it, give it a firm slap to relieve some of the itch.  Needless to say, DG was slapping my back a lot throughout the next few weeks.

Also?  You will shed ink-stained epidermal cells for a few days like a molting reptile.  No, your tattoo isn't coming off.  That's just a natural part of the healing.

Yeek.

And, that's it.  From start to finish, the whole process in which it took me to get a tattoo.  How was it?  Crazy.  Amazing.  Definitely an experience that I'm glad I got to cross off my Bucket List.  Would I do it again?  Maybe.  Once you know what to expect, it's definitely a less daunting prospect, but two things might deter me from another tat:

1. It is an investment.  Not like, crazy expensive, but not a thing that I would spend my money on, willy nilly.
2. I am still a professional employee, and for some stupid reason, tattoos are still kinda taboo.  Placement is going to need to be key, but I do actually want to put my next tattoo in a more visible region.

So, to those of you who have hemmed and hawed over the idea of getting some ink yourself?  I say, why not?  Do the research, find an artist that you like, and then go for it.  You won't regret it.  ...Unless you get it when you're blitzed, in which case you might.  

Until the next.